Congratulations New Mom. Becoming a mother is magical, amazing, exhausting, overwhelming, and a blessing all rolled into one. You will remember this time for the rest of your life. That first moment you became a mother.
Years from now you will wonder how you ever managed to make it through, but at the same time wonder how you ever doubted you could. It’s a confusing time (I blame it on lack of sleep), but a time I will never forget. This is why I thought about what I would tell myself then if I had the knowledge and experience I do now.
This is a letter to new moms. A letter I would have wrote to myself when I first became a mother. This message I wish I could have heard as a first time mom. These are the things that all new moms need to hear. I hope you enjoy this message for mom.
Letter to New Mom
Dear Exhausted First Time Mom,
So you are a mom now. Isn’t that amazing?! It’s me, I mean you, but future you. Let me start out by saying it will all be okay and everything is going to work out. You are now the mother of 2 wonderful children.
Yes I know, right now in this moment in time you feel like you have no idea what you are doing. But you know what, that is 100% okay because before you know it, you will.
You will soon know exactly what to do when your baby is crying. That cry you hear right now, eventually you will know what that cry means. That’s right, there are different cries and they all signify a different need. You will soon know if that is a hungry cry, gassy uncomfortable cry, or a tired cry.
Right now you are tired, probably exhausted, and wondering what you got yourself into. You may feel alone and scared to speak your true feelings. Don’t be afraid and don’t feel ashamed for not knowing exactly what to do.
You are not alone either, there are people that love you and want to help and all you need to do is ask. Let others help, accept help. This does not mean you are a failure. Accepting help actually makes you a better mom.
“There’s no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one.” – Jill Churchill
The newborn phase may seem like it is never going to end, but they call it a phase for a reason. The phase will be over before you know it and once it does you are going to wonder where your baby went. Enjoy it while you can.
Of course there are things that are not enjoyable. I mean I didn’t say it wasn’t hard. I’m sure you are wondering if your nipples are ever going to feel the same again. Wondering whether or not breastfeeding is always going to hurt. I promise it gets better and easier.
Pretty soon you will be a pro at breastfeeding and sharing your knowledge and tips with other new moms. By the way, get some coconut oil now and use it on your sore cracked nipples. Sleep also gets better. Now don’t expect to get the sleep you got pre-pregnancy, but it does get a lot better.
Your baby will eventually fall asleep on their own and no longer cry out in the night for you. Partly because they are now in a toddler bed and can just come to you instead. So now instead of hearing cries, you get to open your eyes to your mini me standing there staring at you in the dark and scaring you half to death.
But don’t worry, she just wants another hug and to be tucked back into bed. Another I Love You and another Lullaby song. For now though, enjoy those endless late night cuddles when she fits just perfectly on your chest.
There will always be new challenges to come. But each one you are going to master. Just in time for another challenge. But no matter the challenge being a mom is the best thing you have ever done.
“Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn’t know you had, and dealing with fears you didn’t know existed.” – Linda Wooten
Motherhood has made you so strong, stronger than you ever thought possible. Trust your instincts. You don’t need to listen to or take all the advice you receive. You know what’s best for your baby so trust yourself.
Don’t listen to people that tell you you’re spoiling your baby by holding them too much. You can NOT spoil a newborn. Plus, Baby Wearing helps to bounce out any gas that may be trapped making your baby fussy. Holding them all day or letting them take all their naps on you will not create any bad habits. So don’t feel like you are doing anything wrong.
Your baby has now turned into your whole life. This tiny baby is now the center of your universe. But do NOT forget to take care of yourself too. Take some time for yourself. You matter too. Taking some time for yourself does not make you selfish or unappreciative of your baby.
Give yourself time to lose the pregnancy belly. It took over 9 months to put on the extra weight and it may take that long or longer to get rid of it. Don’t think you have to do a million crunches to flatten your tummy.
Pregnancy can make you develop Diastasis Recti (yes, I know you haven’t heard of that yet). Do exercises for that instead of the typical ab exercises, it helps with the mommy pooch you will develop.
Give yourself a break. Even if it is just taking a short walk or a quiet bath. You need some time to yourself. It can be overwhelming as a new mom but time alone can help alleviate some of that stress and give you some perspective.
You can do this! And you are going to be great at it. You already are. Don’t ever forget that you are doing an awesome job.
Until later, Love,